So Baby Cologne is a Thing…


So, my in-laws came over for Russian New Year last night and they brought gifts. My mother-in-law likes to give fragrance as gifts and I have more perfume than I know what do with. Maks also received another bottle of cologne.

“And here!” She spoke to me in broken English. “Something for Bo!”

She handed me a stocking filled with what I assumed were toys. After all, it was Orthodox New Year and we hosted them at our home. Time for celebration for all, you know?


It wasn’t until I opened the stocking and saw she wasn’t kidding; she actually bought Bo baby perfume.

Now despite the issues I’ve had with my mother-in-law over the years (and I still do but I’m adult enough to be cordial), I didn’t get upset at her for bringing over baby cologne. Honestly, I didn’t know that even existed.

And apparently, baby cologne is very popular…


Of course, I couldn’t do this post without reviewing each cologne. I need to preface this – we have no intention of putting any of this cologne on Bear whatsoever. While they might claim they’re alcohol-free (three of them weren’t), I don’t know what allergens Bear or his classmates might have.

And honestly, why in the blue hayle would I put cologne on a baby or toddler?



To purchase, click here.

This one actually doesn’t smell too bad. I would actually wear it, though it’s supposedly meant for boys. It’s nice, light, and a tad sweet. I guess, just like a baby (I’ll be here all night, ladies and gentlemen…).


To purchase, click here.

This was a seriously cute bottle of cologne. Honestly, it was pretty strong for a child and we felt it was perfect for a teenager. It was very woodsy with some earth notes. So, hey, if you have a teen boy who wants to have some smell good for the ladies, check this out.

Kaloo also didn’t smell bad. Bonus – it came with a finger puppet that Bear loved. Kaloo was also nice and light, almost like a baby powder. I would probably wear this one.

To purchase, click here.


Now, I used to work for J&J so I was rather surprised they had a baby cologne. Then again, I haven’t worked for them in years so I’m sure a lot has transpired since then. It wasn’t a bad smell. It smelled pretty much like any J&J baby product – baby powder and sweet. Again, I would probably wear this myself.

To purchase, click here.


This is a different box from what is pictured above and I’m assuming we must’ve got a sample size or a different cologne. It doesn’t really matter. This Tweety cologne I wouldn’t even give to my worst enemy. Plastic, piss, and vinegar comes to mine in describing this scent. I’ll keep it because the bottles are cute. I just have to put on a hazmat uniform before I can.

So, there you have it! If you want to channel your inner celebrity mother, check these out and many others!



Filed Under WTF?

I should probably start a new category for this blog. Things pregnancy-related that just make no damn sense. This gem, I found online. If you ever needed a reason why I refuse to have a cake at my baby shower…



I have to admit the creativity of this…